I Rushed Into Marriage, Now I’m Paying the Price

Hi Tales, this is my story....

I dated my ex-boyfriend for almost seven years. We built dreams together, made plans for the future, and even bought items for our engagement. I truly believed we were heading toward marriage. But everything fell apart when he got another woman pregnant. That moment changed my life completely, and we had no choice but to go our separate ways.

At the time, I was in my late thirties. The pressure to get married became overwhelming from my family, my church, and even friends. It felt like everyone had something to say about my life. I was constantly reminded that I was “running out of time.” The pressure became so intense that I even went to a prayer camp, hoping for a miracle, but nothing changed.

Out of desperation, I agreed to marry a man my mother introduced to me. I didn’t take the time to truly know or understand him. I felt rushed, pushed by the fear of being alone and judged for not being married.

The reality of the marriage hit me quickly. Within the first six months, I found myself carrying almost all the financial responsibilities in the house. I paid the bills without complaining because he told me he had taken a loan from work to finance our wedding. He said once he finished repaying it, things would get better. But now, two years later, nothing has changed. Instead, the situation has become heavier. We now have a child, and I carry that responsibility almost entirely on my own. What hurts the most is his attitude. He doesn’t ask how the bills are paid or how I manage everything. His only concern is food. If he comes home and there’s no meal ready, it becomes a serious problem. Arguments break out, and the house becomes tense and unbearable.

I have tried to seek help. I spoke to elders he respects, hoping they would intervene and help him understand, but nothing has changed.

Now I feel exhausted emotionally, physically, and mentally. I am drained.

I want to leave this marriage, but I’m afraid. I worry about what society will say. I worry about my son and how he will cope. And as a Christian, I have always believed that divorce should only happen in cases of adultery.

But at the same time, I am hurting deeply. This marriage is no longer a place of peace it is a burden I carry every single day.

What do I do? A lady in dilemma.